Your Go-To Reading List for Understanding Past Patterns, Childhood Wounds, and Nervous System Recovery
Books can be powerful tools for healing. Whether you're working through trauma, navigating grief, recovering from emotional neglect, or trying to build healthier relationships, the right book can offer both insight and companionship on the journey.
Below is a carefully curated list of my favorite psychology books—each one chosen for its trauma-informed, research-backed, and emotionally validating approach. These titles offer practical tools, deep emotional wisdom, and a sense of “Oh—I’m not alone.”
1. It’s OK That You’re Not OK by Megan Devine
Topic: Grief, Loss, Validation
In this raw and compassionate book, grief expert Megan Devine shares her personal experience of losing her fiancé to a sudden drowning and challenges the cultural expectation to “move on.” Instead, she normalizes grief as a healthy, human response and offers practical, non-toxic ways to support yourself—or someone you love—through deep sorrow.
💬 Why it matters: Validating, trauma-informed, and beautifully written for anyone grieving in a grief-illiterate culture.
2. The Wild Edge of Sorrow by Francis Weller
Topic: Collective Grief, Ritual, Emotional Depth
Francis Weller introduces the “Five Gates of Grief,” including personal loss, ancestral grief, and the sorrow of the world. With a poetic and soulful voice, he reframes grief as a communal, necessary emotion that can connect us more deeply to ourselves and others.
💬 Why it matters: A stunning resource for those navigating complex grief, climate anxiety, or existential sorrow.
3. The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
Topic: Trauma Recovery, Nervous System, Somatic Healing
One of the most cited trauma books in the world, this seminal work explores how trauma reshapes the brain, body, and mind. Dr. van der Kolk introduces body-based and evidence-based tools such as EMDR, yoga, neurofeedback, and somatic therapy.
💬 Why it matters: A must-read for anyone seeking to understand PTSD, complex trauma, and the mind-body connection.
4. Running on Empty by Jonice Webb, PhD
Topic: Childhood Emotional Neglect, Self-Worth, Inner Validation
This groundbreaking book introduces the concept of emotional neglect—what wasn’t said, done, or acknowledged in your childhood—and how it quietly shapes adult struggles with self-esteem, identity, and relationships.
💬 Why it matters: Especially helpful for high-functioning adults who feel “off” but can’t quite explain why.
5. Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller
Topic: Attachment Styles, Relationship Patterns, Emotional Safety
Levine and Heller break down the science of adult attachment into an accessible, actionable framework. Learn how your attachment style—anxious, avoidant, or secure—affects your love life and how to build stronger, more emotionally safe relationships.
💬 Why it matters: Great for anyone who feels stuck in relationship patterns or confused about emotional intimacy.
Final Thoughts: Healing is Not a Solo Project
These books are not a substitute for therapy—but they can be a powerful supplement. They remind you that your pain makes sense, your story matters, and there are practical ways to shift long-held patterns.
If you’re ready to go deeper in a safe, supportive space, I offer trauma-informed therapy for adults navigating identity confusion, grief, anxiety, and relationship struggles—especially those living abroad or with a history of childhood trauma. Book a free consultation today.
Related Articles
Here are some other articles that might interest you as you continue your healing journey:
- Healing from Complex PTSD: Understanding Symptoms & Recovery
- What is Complex PTSD? You Got Diagnosed, Now What?
- Understanding the Difference Between PTSD and Complex PTSD (C-PTSD)
- Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT): A Proven Approach to Healing Trauma
- Healing PTSD with Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT)
- Managing Anxiety: Practical Tips and Coping Strategies to Regain Control
- How to Practice Self-Compassion, Set Boundaries, and Build Emotional Safety in Therapy
- Why You Emotionally Shut Down Around Your Parent—and How to Reclaim Your Power
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